Edith Simcox, Autobiography, 1-10 April 1878
Title
Edith Simcox, Autobiography, 1-10 April 1878
Title
Edith Simcox, Autobiography, 1-10 April 1878
Sender
Edith Simcox
Recipient
U
Date(s)
- 1878-04-01–<br /> 1878-04-10
Place
London
Letter Content
Edith Simcox, Autobiography, 1-10 April 1878
MS: Bodleian
Monday 1 April 1878
April 1. Last Wednesday I went again; stayed only a few minutes as she was reading the Ms. of his book, 433 but I got a kiss or two and the chance of bemoaning myself at the coming summer; I said I wished her house 434 ready betimes and so on for her sake but not for my own. She said she liked people to be a little unhappy when she went -- did not care for a too disinterested affection. I had a commission which will give me an excuse for going again this week and today I have written to her -- what I hope will not be displeasing -- oh! I love her dearly dearly.
Saturday 6 April 1878
April 6. Yesterday I had a few lines bidding me come on Wednesday [10 April] at 3.30 for an hour to "hear and say more than can be written." I am anxious and yet content, I feel that nothing that she can say will fail to touch me.
Wednesday 10 April 1878
Arrived to the moment. Began with little talk about cuffs and handkerchiefs. Elizabeth brought tea. Presently she said: she knew so well the state of mind in which I had written when there seemed no inducements to choose one kind of work rather than another. She had nothing to suggest as to ways of determining oneself, only thought it a pity to feel bound to produce; I tried to explain that production -- or the inclination thereto -- came of itself if I took up any subject -- but I was blankly idle now. She could not understand the want of natural interest without ulterior purpose, but said Mr Lewes also, unlike her, only cared for lines of enquiry etc. in view of a particular end, she sometimes wished he had more hobbies -- Could I not take up a language or a science? I had referred to an old taste for teaching, she thought it was a pity I should not have pupils. She said once, more as an assertion than a question that I was sincere in wishing to do and would take any opportunity that came even if it was rather hard. She called the shirtmaking an excellent bit of work, only had hoped that the idea might have spread more rapidly. Mr. Lewes was dining out and I prayed to be allowed to stay without talking till he came in. She said she couldn't read with me there. I complained a little at such evidence that one did not belong to her and she spoke of her complete dependence on his society and unreasonable anxiety when he was away. This was all on the 10th.
MS: Bodleian
Monday 1 April 1878
April 1. Last Wednesday I went again; stayed only a few minutes as she was reading the Ms. of his book, 433 but I got a kiss or two and the chance of bemoaning myself at the coming summer; I said I wished her house 434 ready betimes and so on for her sake but not for my own. She said she liked people to be a little unhappy when she went -- did not care for a too disinterested affection. I had a commission which will give me an excuse for going again this week and today I have written to her -- what I hope will not be displeasing -- oh! I love her dearly dearly.
Saturday 6 April 1878
April 6. Yesterday I had a few lines bidding me come on Wednesday [10 April] at 3.30 for an hour to "hear and say more than can be written." I am anxious and yet content, I feel that nothing that she can say will fail to touch me.
Wednesday 10 April 1878
Arrived to the moment. Began with little talk about cuffs and handkerchiefs. Elizabeth brought tea. Presently she said: she knew so well the state of mind in which I had written when there seemed no inducements to choose one kind of work rather than another. She had nothing to suggest as to ways of determining oneself, only thought it a pity to feel bound to produce; I tried to explain that production -- or the inclination thereto -- came of itself if I took up any subject -- but I was blankly idle now. She could not understand the want of natural interest without ulterior purpose, but said Mr Lewes also, unlike her, only cared for lines of enquiry etc. in view of a particular end, she sometimes wished he had more hobbies -- Could I not take up a language or a science? I had referred to an old taste for teaching, she thought it was a pity I should not have pupils. She said once, more as an assertion than a question that I was sincere in wishing to do and would take any opportunity that came even if it was rather hard. She called the shirtmaking an excellent bit of work, only had hoped that the idea might have spread more rapidly. Mr. Lewes was dining out and I prayed to be allowed to stay without talking till he came in. She said she couldn't read with me there. I complained a little at such evidence that one did not belong to her and she spoke of her complete dependence on his society and unreasonable anxiety when he was away. This was all on the 10th.
Citation
Edith Simcox, Edith Simcox, Autobiography, 1-10 April 1878, Complete George Eliot Letters(2026), George Eliot Archive, edited by Beverley Park Rilett. https://GeorgeEliotArchive.org, Accessed September 7, 2026. https://www.georgeeliotarchive.org/items/show/91767